Children's Song

We live in our own world,
A world that is too small
For you to stoop and enter
Even on hands and knees,
The adult subterfuge.
And though you probe and pry
With analytic eye,
And eavesdrop all our talk
With an amused look,
You cannot find the centre
Where we dance, where we play.
Where life is still asleep
Under the closed flower,
Under the smooth shell
Of eggs in the cupped nest
That mock the faded blue
Of your remoter heaven.

R.S. Thomas

"By the time you realise that childhood is where paradise exists, you've far outgrown that stage."

i wish i was a 5 year old kid again, always being loved for being a little child and forgiven for everything i did wrong. i wish i dint have to face this yelling this shouting these attempts at emotional blackmail every day. but hoping and wishing never did turn back time.

is this what everyone goes through when they're 15? im hoping it is. then i wont feel so alone. teenagehood: having the responsibilities and expectations of an adult, but given the respect and power of a child. perhaps that's a little exaggerated but sometimes i really feel like im trapped, suffocating in the space between these two worlds. but bursting out of a cocoon prematurely never did anyone any good, so i wont.

who said anything bout teenagehood being easy? maybe adults could try remembering how they were like when they were teenagers? maybe parents could do with a little more understanding and not shoutshoutSHOUT and give me a charcoal face all the time? my mum's temper is short as my fingernails nowadays.

i say something, she seems fine with it, then 5 min later she comes into my room and has a fit. then now she leaves me home alone with no dinner. like @#$!%^&*?!

okay i let the steam out. back to geog homework. not that i know how to do it that is.